Time for Another

the diary of our quest for baby number 2

The homestretch Monday 9 June 2008

It could be any day although the reality is more likely 4-8wks. We are ok for a home waterbirth from 37 wks (I’ll be 34 wks tomorrow) so I hope he hangs on until then. We have a small amount of decorating to finish before we finally get the flat on the market – I’m determined to have it for sale before we have this little fellow, because once he arrives, life will be manic and we’ll never get around to it.

Healthwise, I’m ok – we had a small scare a couple of weeks ago when I had a terrible headache and felt nauseous all day so we ended up paying a trip to the labour ward for monitoring. Thankfully pre-eclampsia was ruled out and we think it was probably just a migraine or virus. I’m now having fortnightly midwife appointments and last time we discussed what might be done with the placenta – I’ve been thinking more and more about this as the time comes to give birth. Initially I thought keeping the placenta was a bit gross, but the more time goes on, I think it would be nice to bury it with the twins’ cherry tree. It won’t be *just* the placenta but the twins will be part of it, along with their placenta – it’s some sort of closure for me to bury them together and have a resting place for them. Even though it’s still a bit freaky to think too hard about.  I’ve also had a call from the GPs counsellor who can fit me in for at least one session before my due date. I had wondered if I needed it, but now that it’s been offered, I feel it’s a good thing to go along. I’m definitely not over my grief and guilt of the reduction and in fact as I near the due date, the more it’s on my mind and I’ve had a few weepy moments. Interestingly over the weekend I ended up talking at length to a friend who initially I had thought would have reason to judge (she’s Catholic). However she was a great listener and seemed to understand that we’d been through hell and back and had considered every option possible before coming to the dreadful decision that we did. She told me of a quote from Richard E Grant about grief which goes something like this: ‘You never get over grief, but you do learn to walk around it’. That makes a lot of sense. 

And so as we reach those last few weeks, I’ve got my TENS machine ordered, hospital bag packed for me, baby’s one is prepared and needs putting in a bag (just in case of course!), vague plan of what to do with dd when things kick off, website bookmarked for the birth pool. Birth plan needs to be written up ready, a firmer plan for dd needs to be settled. The decorating needs to be finished and the flat on the market. But we’ll get there!

Other news: DD has potty trained successfully day and night – she’s taken to it like a duck to water, clearly it was the right thing to do to wait until she was ready. We attended our friends’ wedding over the weekend and it was great – beautiful weather, great service, lovely reception. I felt glamourous next to my handsome husband and dd looked so cute it was unbelievable!

Advertisements
 

Phew, it’s warm today Wednesday 21 May 2008

Filed under: 3D scan,4D scan,bump,decorating,facts,potty training — timeforanother @ 1:22 pm

But I’m feeling a lovely sense of well being. Things are all ticking along very nicely – dd has taken to potty training brilliantly and all we have to tackle now is nighttime and nap time staying dry; 4D scan was wonderful; Venture photography was great and we resisted the temptation to buy loads of pictures; I finally have a gorgeous outfit (complete with shoes and bag) for the wedding we’re going to in June; the decorating is almost complete. 😀 😀 😀

Courtesy of iampregnant.com

 

Dates and numbers: 
There are 61 days until your due date on July 22, 2008
You are 219 days pregnant. 
You are 7.2 months pregnant. 
You are in your 8th month of pregnancy. 
Your 3rd trimester: April 29, 2008 to July 22, 2008. (28 – 40 weeks)
I weigh 11 stone and I would give a bump measurement but I can’t find the tape measure – but it feels pretty big!

Just one of several wonderful photos we got from the 4D scan. He was mostly sleeping so we didn’t bother with the DVD but it was just fantastic to see him having little wriggles, and waving his arm around at the end. He looks like his sister and daddy and is a proper cutie (well, if him mama can’t say that, who can?!) I can’t wait to meet him now – it’s definitely helped me with the bonding thing.

 

 

30wks tomorrow Monday 12 May 2008

Another milestone about to be reached. Although 8-10wks to go still sounds like a long wait. We must start practicing the Hypnobirthing techniques, particularly as the course was so brilliant this time around. I’ve organised a basic hospital bag (something I didn’t do last time), know which birthing pool to order, have got the carrycot bit for our Xplory, washed all clothes and sheets and all we have to do now is find a name for the Wriggler. We hope that seing him a bit more clearly at the 4D scan on Friday will help a little, although he usually behaves very coyly at scans.

Not sure if it’s the heat but he has barely stopped moving over the last couple of days, which is nice in some ways but also quite tiring. I nearly fainted in the kitchen yesterday – just because it’s hot and the oven was on. DH came to the rescue 🙂 Today my hands and feet feel swollen and tight and all I really want to do is lie in the cool and sleep; the chances of that happening are about as good as odds on pigs doing a fly-by passed the window!

Can’t remember when I last posted or in fact what I posted… so sorry if I repeat myself. I got signed off from my consultant last Tuesday as the pregnancy is all developing as it should. It’s only really in my head where the ‘problem’ lies. I still can’t shake off my feelings of deep guilt and sadness about the twins. There isn’t a day goes by where I don’t think about what we did and whether it was the right choice. There are now at least two ladies on Bounty who have announced triplet pregnancies (and of course, they are going ahead) and I can’t help myself but read their stories. A tiny bit of me wants to hear that things don’t work out which is pretty sick to admit, but if they are successful, it’s just another smack in my face, proving that it can be done, and relatively easily.

We got around to buying a cherry tree the other week, and the recent sunshine has seen it sprouting lots of greenery on an otherwise lifeless looking stick. Signs of spring with bittersweet undertones.

Decorating has been more off than on, but the carpenter and his dad came back today and finished hanging the doors and sorting out of the laminate floor edging (well, some of it). Also, the underfloor heating which we installed at least 3yrs ago, is finally connected to the electricity supply. On the hottest day of the year so far. There must be some irony in that. Our latest plan is to sell up asap, pay off our debts, hopefully keep a chunk of money for a deposit, then rent for 6mths-1yr locally. It doesn’t matter then if prices rise, fall or stay the same – we’ll still be in a better position than when we started out, despite not having the flat as an asset. Initially a little scary, but the more we talk it through, the more appealing it seems. Plus, we’re planning a 3wk holiday over Christmas and New Year, somewhere warm, with a kids club so we can escape the usual shenanigans, and be somewhere far away from the memories that will surely return as the anniversary of discovering the triplets approaches.

Enough for tonight, time to sleep.

 

24 weeks – baby is now ‘viable’ Tuesday 1 April 2008

Filed under: 24wks,decorating,house hunting,losing the baby,Uncategorized,viable,worries — timeforanother @ 10:15 am

Wow – this really is a big milestone to reach. I can’t help but remember the times when I really didn’t believe we would get here – everything seemed doomed with this pg and I truly believed that this little wriggler wouldn’t hold on. I still have an inkling that he might just turn up early but I’m more hopeful that it won’t be *too* early.

Everything is going ok – decorating continues, the bedroom has become a temporary storage facility, our dd is due back tomorrow (how I’ve missed her) and the house hunting is proving better each time – although we haven’t found THE ONE yet.

Off to visit my folks this weekend and I’m looking forward to some r&r, and a shopping trip to buy some much needed maternity jeans as I’m literally living in the one pair I have.

Still feeling enormous pangs of grief and guilt about the twins but I’m learning to live with them.