And all is well. Emotionally things are looking up, although I’m aware of how quickly this can change and for no apparent reason. The swimming last week helped a little, a lot of memories came flooding back as the last time I was at that pool, was the morning of the reduction. It was weird being back there but only with one baby, not the triplets. But, tiring as the actual swimming was, I actually felt full of energy when I got home and managed to do loads of housework and more importantly lots of playing with dd.
It was another consultant appt on Tues this week but my regular obstetrician was busy so I saw another doctor. He was very friendly but I did get the impression that he didn’t quite understand why I was there. Oh well. He gave us a quickish scan and all the measurements are looking bang on target for the dates – according to the charts, Wriggler weighs around 1lb 3oz which I find fascinating.
We’re still struggling to find a name for this little fellow – nothing is quite right somehow, but then again, we had the same thing with our dd and it was only near the end of the pg when we came across her name. We’re hoping the same will happen this time.
Other non pg news. Our cat went to the vets this week and had 9 teeth removed. Poor thing has a genetic disposition for manky rotten teeth apparently so they had to come out. Thankfully she’s fully recovered and is eating without any problems. She hates not being able to go outside so after 2 days of enforced houseboundness, I gave in to the pitiful wowing and headbutting of the catflap, and let her out. She darted out and was back 10mins later looking much more content. Bless!
The decorating has begun, finally! DDs room is first to get a freshen up and already it’s looking great. I spent yesterday boxing up old toys and baby things so they can go off to our storage unit – the great selling/moving project is underway after much discussion and list making. Feels good 🙂 Although the rest of the flat looks a complete pigsty with stuff everywhere! Where does it all come from?
And so back to the pg – I have my last counselling session today and it feels about right. It hasn’t really told me anything I didn’t already know but it’s been good to discuss my thoughts with someone who doesn’t judge. Today I feel like our experience and in particular my experience is something which I just have to learn to live with. It’s a part of my life whether I like it or not and the associated feelings are what makes me me. There are going to be things which trigger sadness and things which will fade into the background. I will always be a mama to a beautiful little girl and our triplets. Our son will learn about his twin siblings when the time is right and I know I love them as much now as I would have done had they stayed with us.